Who would you choose to kill you? This is something I have been thinking about a lot lately. Society seems to be killing us all, but somehow and/or somewhere along the way I seemed to have earned more than the average when it comes to daily attempted murder. It has something to do with my birthright and no one has ever really explained it to me. Covert messages are not really my bag.
I miss my Mom, but I know my Brother is killing her and I am pretty sure they will have to try to kill me too. The people in Eugene/Springfield know of me well, but they know more of what my family gossips about me than who I really am. If my family really knew me would I have made it this far? This long?
98 days ago I left Sierra Vista, Arizona. I had been there alone since 2018. Before that, I lived in Las Vegas alone since 2015. It has been 6 years since anyone really tried to get to know me and I allowed it to happen. Everyone gets to see pieces and sides of me, but no one has earned the whole picture ever. I had been so poisoned and medicated my whole life, I never even really knew myself till wandering the desert the past 6 years.
Can anyone truly know you when they do not know themselves? I repeatedly see people who know more about my birthright than I do. However, these are people who do not know themselves. I may not know my birthright, but I sure know who I am as an individual. Also, I know this is the person people are not interested in knowing. This is why I write.
Value the people who are truly interested in knowing who you are. These are the people who will make you a better human. These are the people who will encourage you to follow your dreams and challenge yourself. These are the people who will push you to live outside your comfort zone and face your fears. Do the things that make you feel small and scare you, this is where you will find who you really are.
This is why I am going home with hopes that people are really ready to get to know me. I am so much more than my birthright.