Are You Ready To Get Mad With Me, Yet?

Now, I understand why the people in Ashland, Oregon looked so shameful and guilt filled. I even felt bad for them and wanted them to feel better. I see you people breaking more and more as time goes by.

My Aunt N gave my Mom a shot at controlling and taking care of me. This is why my Mom was so fear filled when I told her I was leaving. And why she sent me a kind text this morning in response to the you tube video I sent her about healing fatty liver a couple days ago. See how it can be so confusing, I just want her to be a good person. I always have been willing to forgive her if she just desired to be a good person for real. And why does she spend so much on self care and then not do it right? I embody what she pretends to be. Kinda crazy, huh? Now do you understand more of why she hates me? She wants to be me. It’s like the Russian version of single white female. Lol

Well, my Mom failed, but she did good at messing with my heart and mind. Nothing out of the usual. However, she was not very effective because she does not know me now(or really ever), even she asked about me changing with her evil satisfied look. Because she knows that she stole me from myself for most of my life, simply because I am better than and not interested in destruction.

Since my Mom does not know me, she was unable to push my buttons effectively to get my cortisol to spike. This pissed her off, but was really rewarding for me. Social norms are what she normally got to me with, but after living in a death camp. Fuck social norms. I am just trying to survive here.

How much longer will you all allow yourself to be lead by such illogical people? How much longer do I need to survive before you all seek a revolution? I am pretty sure that is the only way I will ever get to live a somewhat normal life. Normal is so out of my reach for me, it is not even funny. How much longer are you willing to submit to such illogical madness?

You know they lied about me and my people, then they lied about my death(see how arrogant they are), and now they are just being mean because they are jealous. I can fix the mess they have created and you know I do not wish for anyone to go to prison because I believe in healing. What else do I need to prove to you people in order for you to see my worth? You realize and see how they are acting like herion addicts looking for a fix ,right?

You realize my heart, soul, and brain are better right? What else do you need? I will do it. I will continue to prove I am good person who will sacrifice her own desires for the best interest of the collective. Why are you continuing to follow them? What else do they have on you? Sexual abuse? Who the fuck cares about sexual abuse when they are trying to destroy everything and everyone? They get you to do their dirty work so they can threaten you with being looked at as the bad guy, but they are already painting you to be the bad guy. What else do you have to loose? Have you reached your breaking point yet? Are you ready to get mad, yet?

Nothing will change until you find your breaking point, get mad, and do something about it. For my sake, I hope that is soon.

Love Always

Nicole

Somewhere near Cottonwood, California at a rest stop on I5 South. Come watch how much gas they are lighting up the night sky with tonight. The more witnesses the safer I will be. This is something they cannot punish you for, so load up your rv for the night and get here asap please.

Leave a Reply