Everyone who is anyone is a serial killer in my family cult. This is how they get you engulfed in their evil. They create sins for you to run from for a lifetime, never to fully escape. This is why my survival is so maddening to so many people. Accountability is a superpower, but I can see how some of you just wanted to live your life. And then there are the others who truly enjoy the war games because they make them feel important and alive inside. It is an emotional spectrum that can vary day to day.
I passed my Oregon state school and testing this week. Now I am just waiting for my license back from the state. This was a test I was not supposed to pass. We will all have to see how long it takes to process my application. We can all pretty much assume it will take longer than expected for some random reason.
Gaslighting is still an great occurrance, but I have figured out another weird rule. My family is bound by some weird rules to be supportive in my new career. They have never showed support for anything I have done, so I can only assume they have realized they need to control the narrative of their side of the story in a public manner. I can appreciate this.
Now I enjoy my fake interactions with my family, because we all know how fake it is. But yall I can’t lie, it is nice to be supported. Even though it is fake, it still makes my brain release dopamine. This is how my family cult gets you with nlp. They tell you who you are and create a dopamine response, only to out of nowhere start chopping you down and keep you seeking their approval. Which you will never be able to completely grasp. It is a cycle that just keeps on repeating. At least, until you realize the patterns and escape.
What events in your life have been implanted by society/my family cult playing your body like a fiddle to get the desired hormonal disregulation that makes you self destruct? This is something I have found myself curious about. I see you all out there in pain and I have been in this pain before. What separates those who are willing to do the work from those who just are not willing to make the sacrifices? Is there a point of no return physically? or mentally? What makes people give up?
Hope is the answer. Hope separates the average from the great. When you have hope you keep striving for more because you believe in greatness. And when you believe in greatness, you can move mountains. Believing it is half of the battle. Once you see you are deserving and worthy, the universe works wonders for you.