Narcissistic families are run much like cults. They believe in brainwashing their members to believe the world is to be feared and family is the only thing that will and can save you. When you are born into a narcissistic family cult you know no different or better, so everything seems normal and you assume everyone’s family is similar. No child would assume their family is at the root of their difficulties in life.
Here are 11 traits of cults and narcissistic families:
- The group(family) displays excessively zealous and unquestioning commitment to its leader, and (whether he is alive or dead) regards his belief system, ideology, and practices as the Truth, as law.
- Questioning, doubt, and dissent are discouraged or even punished.
- The leadership dictates, sometimes in great detail, how members should think, act, and feel.
- The group(family) is elitist, claiming a special, exalted status for itself, its leader(s), and its members
- The group(family) has a polarized, us-versus-them mentality, which may cause conflict with the wider society.
- The leader is not accountable to any authorities
- The leadership induces feelings of shame and/or guilt in order to influence and control members. Often this is done through peer pressure and subtle forms of persuasion.
- The group(family) is preoccupied with bringing in new members.
- The group(family) is preoccupied with making money.
- Members are expected to devote inordinate amounts of time to the group and group-related activities.
- Members are encouraged or required to live and/or socialize only with other group members.
Growing up in a multigenerational narcissistic cult is the experience that scarred me the most. It distances your reality from actual reality, by design, and makes you question yourself and the validity of your feelings for a lifetime. If you are the only one who sees and feels the dysfunction it must be something wrong with you. Understanding the abuse that your mind, body, and soul endured as a result of your narcissistic family cult is the only way towards healing and recovery. These people are not family and they are not motivated by love. Narcissistic family cults merely want to keep you stuck, so you have no other choice but to endure their abuse for a lifetime. Love is not supposed to hurt, you deserve better.