Author: Nizi

What is love? When you love someone what does it feel like? Love is when someone makes you feel good. When you love yourself it is because you make yourself feel good. And when you love someone else it is because they make you feel good. Loving yourself or someone else really has nothing to do with who or what they are. But it has everything to do with how they make you feel.

Someone who hates themself, really just hates how they make themselves feel. It has really nothing to do with who they are as a person. And it has everything to do with how they make themselves feel. If they wanted to start loving themselves, all they would have to do is start making themselves feel good.

How does someone make you feel loved? What do they actually have to do? Love means making someone feel accepted, heard, good enough, important, useful, understood, worthy, deserving, etc. Love is a flood of different good feelings. And we all have certain needs that lead us to feeling loved. Some of us need more acceptance. Some of us need more affection. Some of us need more acts of service. We all recieve love differently. And there is nothing wrong with these different needs.

Are you fulfilling your own needs to make yourself feel loved? You have to love yourself and accept yourself first. Because you can’t give from an empty cup. When you give acceptance to someone else, it has to be from your overflow. Otherwise it is at a detriment. When you are on an airplane, they teach you to put your air mask on first before you help your child. You have to be able to breath before you can help others. You have to take care of yourself and your own needs before you can take care of another.

Have you ever done something you don’t like doing with someone you love and it been not so bad? I hate fancy restaurants. But some of my boyfriends have really liked food and fancy restaurants. Occassionally, I would give in and go to a fancy restaurant with them just to make them happy. I thought this was what you do for the people you love. Because when I would go to a fancy restaurant with them it wouldn’t be so bad because they loved it. And I thought my enjoyment of these occasions had to do with love.

But really this was just my mirror neurons and empathy. When I did these things, I would be partaking in a shared state of being. I hate fancy food and restaurants. But some of my boyfriends loved them. It wasn’t that I loved the fancy food or the restaurants. And it wasn’t even that I loved them as people. It was the love of partaking in a shared state of being.

When you are in relationships you make compromises. We are taught to call this love. But love is when someone makes you feel good. If you are doing something you dislike, you are not being made to feel good. You are partaking in a shared state of being with your mirror neurons and empathy. You are enjoying the state of another person’s being. It’s not that I loved fancy food all of a sudden. It’s that I loved the way that person made me feel. But it wasn’t love. It was a shared state of being taking part in my brain via my mirror neurons. It was my empathy, not love.

Often we confuse love with partaking in shared states of being. Love is when someone makes you feel good. But the key is they have to make you feel good without taking part in an activity. So just someone sitting there with you making you feel good. No talking, no watching television, all your clothes on, no touching. Basically love is when someone is with you doing nothing and it makes you feel good. If you love someone because you like doing things with them, that’s not love. That is partaking in a shared state of being. This is enjoying someone. Enjoying someone is very different than love. How many people have you known who you could do absolutely nothing with and they make you feel good? Because that is love. Having an activities partner is not love.

Even having someone that you come together with to create a shared experience and state of being with around a certain goal is not love. Aka marriage, creating a family, and business partnerships are not necessarily love. These are coming together to create a shared experience and state of being around a certain goal. This is partnership. Arranged marriages are partnership. But they are not always love. Business partners are a partnership, but they are rarely love. Doing things with another person is not love. It’s just a shared state of being. It’s just your mirror neurons and empathy at work. It’s not always love. It’s actually rarely love.

We are not meant to call shared states of being love. We can utilize our mirror neurons with anyone. It has nothing to do with love. However, we are supposed to love ourselves. We should be able to sit and do nothing with ourselves and feel good. That is love. If you can’t sit with yourself doing nothing and make yourself feel good, you will not be able to do it with someone else. We are taught that we love always. But love is the exception to the rule. It is rare. Maybe if you are lucky you will find one or two people in a lifetime that you can do nothing with and feel good.

Humans are not meant to love each other. We are meant to love ourselves. And we are meant to enjoy each other.

A culture is just a group of people who come together with shared beliefs. Those shared beliefs create patterns in behavior. However, when these shared beliefs are lies the people start livng lies.

Love is a lie. We are supposed to enjoy each other. But love is rare and often a lie. We are taught to live lies when we have beliefs that are lies. Love is a fairytale. And I have never seen a fairytale where the two main characters did nothing together and made each other feel good. How about you?

The world is a nasty and hateful place. Bad things happen everyday to countless people. It is impossible to live a life without having bad experiences. There will always be things that make you feel sad, mad, and hurt. No matter who you are, you cannot avoid all of these things. It’s humanely impossible.

So how do you deal with these heavy feelings that make you feel sad, mad, and hurt without becoming a nasty hateful person? If the world is a nasty hateful place, how do you deal with all the feelings that weigh you down and make you want to be nasty and hateful yourself? It seems almost impossible, right?

But the solution is perspective and framing your life. When you put a painting in a rose colored frame, the rose colors stand out. When you put a painting in a black frame, the darkness stands out. How do you frame your life? Because the frame determines what stands out. Is your cup half full or is it half empty? Because both glasses have the same amount of liquid in them. What do you want to focus on? What will make you feel better?

Do you want to live your life for love? Or do you want to live your life for hate? Wearing rose colored glasses isnt really about the view. It is about the kind of person you become. If you focus on love, you will love yourself. If you focus on hate, you will hate yourself. Which person do you want to be?

When people give you a hard time about wearing rose colored glasses or being too optimistic, really all they are doing is trying to get you to hate yourself like they hate themselves. The world is a really dark and nasty place. Do you think hating yourself is going to make things any better or easier?

When bad things happen and you start to get nasty and hateful like the world, it feels like that nastiness is happening to you. It doesn’t feel like you are choosing to focus and become nasty yourself. It feels like the nasty is happening to you. And in these moments is when you decide what kind of person you are going to be. Are you going to live for love? Or are you going to live for hate?

When you start saying and doing things to hurt people, you are living for hate. But when you love the things and people you have in your life, you are living for love. Living for love is about gratitude. Your brain is a magical computer. And there is this program in your brain that stops fear and anxiety when you are being grateful. It is literally impossible for your brain to run the program for fear and anxiety at the same time as it is running the program for gratitude. And anxiety is really just the fear of bad things happening in the future. Fear and anxiety are pretty much the same thing.

So when you feel yourself starting to live for hate and when you feel yourself starting to run the anxiety and fear program in your brain all you have to do is start being grateful. This literally rewires your brain and creates new pathways and connections that allow you to live for love. This is how you start loving yourself. Because when you live for love, you love yourself.

And loving yourself isn’t about thinking you are perfect. It’s not about ignoring your flaws or mistakes. It’s about being a realist and knowing you have to appreciate and feel good about yourself in order to have a good life. Your imperfections are still going to exist. You will still be human and make mistakes. But you will give yourself more of a break and you will see the good qualities you have. You have to live for love to love yourself. And you have to love yourself to have a good life.

Having a good life isn’t about escaping all the nasty and hateful things in the world. Having a good life is about the frame you look at things through. Perspective is everything, right? If you live for hate, you will hate yourself. If you live for love, you will love yourself. Which person do you think has a better life? Because they both experience nasty and hateful things.

Springfield

65th street through 69th street both south and north…. especially focus on north of Thurston road

Eugene

east side of coburg road between harlow and willakenzie

west side of coburg road between cal young and beltline

delta area near delta ponds

river road west side hunsaker lane and irvington

river road east side between Irving and irvington

west of hwy 99 between barger and royal all the way till the end

When the western Europeans came to north America to conolize and settle, they started trading with the native Americans. Not only did they trade goods, but they also adopted some cultural ways from the other. When you live in close proximity to another group of people, it is hard not to adopt some of their ways. It’s natural and biological. Your mirror neurons make you copy what you see.

As the Native Americans adopted more things from the Western Europeans, the Western Europeans destroyed the country. And in doing so they destroyed the Native Americans ability to do things as they always had for generations. They destroyed their ability to provide for themselves. And when they knew the native Americans were not able to provide for themselves, as they had for generations, the Western Europeans upped the prices of the goods they traded with the Native Americans.

Yes, the native Americans now had guns. But they were dependent on the western Europeans to get more bullets. And as time went on there were countless other goods that the Native Americans needed from the Western Europeans. It was no longer trading for fun. But it was trading for survival. And the Western Europeans upped the prices greatly because they knew the Native Americans couldn’t survive without the goods.

Then in the Calorolinas, where the Western Europeans had tobacco plantations, the British did the same thing to the colonizers. At first the prices for tobacco were very high and allowed for great profits. But as the colonizer grew more depend on England to purchase their crops, they started to decrease the price they would pay. Which meant the Western European tobacco plantations who used to make great money, were now barely getting by. And it meant that the farmers who just produced what they needed and a little extra to sell or trade were the ones with the real riches. Because they were self sufficient and could take care of themselves. The farmers who focused on sustainability where the colonizers that were not able to be marginalized as greatly. They weren’t at the whim of a foreigner to dictate the quality of their lives.

Foreign trade is amazing and we benefit greatly from it. However, when we rely too heavily on it, we allow a foreign body to dictate the quality of our lives. Just as the Western European colonizers took advantage of the Native Americans, England took advantage of the western European colonizers. Foreign trade can add to our lives. But when we rely on foreign trade for the quality of our daily lives we get taken advantage of. This is the pattern of our modern times. We get too comfortable with foreign trade and become reliant upon it. And it is used to destroy and disable us. People can only take advantage of us if we need something from them.

You know how Trump is all about terrifs on imports? What he is trying to do is to create a strong local economy. This way we have more control over getting our needs met and no one can strong arm us and take advantage. When trade is based on a local economy we have more say and control. We should want to control how we meet our own needs. When a country doesn’t have control over how it meets it’s own needs, they get taken advantage of. This has occurred throughout history in the modern world. Trade is meant to supplement life, not to sustain life.

So what do we all need to do in order to gain more control over our own lives? We need to be more independent and focused on local trade. Money is not the sustainable solution. Self sufficiency is the sustainable solution.

Recently my dog Haywood died. He had health insurance and I had the money to get him medical treatment. But no one would treat me fairly because I was dependent. This was my weakness. And my family used it to destroy me. Money will not fix all of your problems or get you everything you need. Money is a great tool. But self sufficiency is the best weapon for your survival. My whole life I knew I couldn’t trust doctors so I did everything I could to learn about the human body and health. If I had relied on doctors for my well being, I would have died just like my dog. When you rely on someone, even if you pay them, it leaves you vulnerable.

Self sufficiency is the best option for us all. We dont have to be great at everything. But we need to be great at getting as many of our basic needs met independently as possible. That is the only way for us all to become free from the financial domination my family takes part in. We need to meet our own needs locally and independently whenever possible. It protects us and fights against corruption.